Showing posts with label Congressman Jack Kimble. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Congressman Jack Kimble. Show all posts

Friday, June 3, 2011

The Newest Member of Our Family -- Ayn Reagan Kimble

I am very pleased to announce that after a very exhaustive search that took us to over two dozen states and 40 orphanages, we have adopted a new daughter. Seven year old Ayn Reagan Kimble is just the type of daughter we have always wanted and despite her young age is a gifted singer, equestrian, and a winner of several toddler beauty pageants. Just like a Kimble, she's got the fire of competition in her belly already.

Through the talent portion of the search, several orphans were bottle-necked at the top of the standings, but Ayn distinguished herself when she was able to explain how the 1964 Presidential, though a loss for the Republicans, was a watershed moment for the conservative movement in this country.

Kerry deserves much of the credit for locating this beautiful girl who we have named Ayn. While I was in Washington, Kerry took the lead in our search. The St. Benedict's Orphanage we used previously supplied infants to the Republican party during the battle against Obama Care, where they made excellent speaking props. We have chosen February 6th as her birthday, which she will now share with Ronald Reagan.

We know as she gets older, we will have to explain to her that she was adopted and will not get any inheritance from her grandfather, but for now we are an extremely happy family. We intend to take a family bus tour in June to get to know each other before the election campaign really picks up. She will be working as a staffer on my campaign when we return.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Congressman Kimble Takes on Liberals to Promote Employment Reforms

Brad Friedman interviews Congressman Kimble on the Mike Malloy Show

Congressman Jack Kimble when into the belly of the beast to defend H.R. 929 on liberal radio. The legislation, which will extend full employment rights to all Americans regardless of age is strangely controversial in some liberal circles where work is seen as a four letter word.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Jack kimble and Mike Lee Stand Up for Children

Every year the United States imports over $125,000,000,000 from nation's that are known to use child labor under the age of 14. This is inexcusable. It should be American children generating this income. It is for that reason that I have approached Senator Mike Lee (R-UT) about creating a joint resolution to once and for all eliminate troublesome barriers to child labor in the United States.

The statistics are staggering. 8.9 million children are uninsured in this country. By getting them into the workforce, many of them would be eligible for employer funded medical care. When we have healthier young people contributing to their family's income then we have a happier and more productive country.

Mike Lee has long been a champion of the right of children to work and I look forward to working closely with him to end this longstanding discrimination against child workers. Child labor can be a win-win situation where young people learn a trade and their small size allows them to reach into machinery and tight places where an adult could never fit.

In Missouri, Jane Cunningham has courageously led a movement to eliminated child labor laws in that state. SB 222 ironically sharing a name with Karen Valentine's homeroom in an old television show about young people (Room 222), will allow young people the satisfaction of working and being productive citizens. We need to take this movement national if we are to regain our economic edge.

I know some people will look at child labor as a societal evil that must be destroyed, but understand I would never advocate a child under 11 work full time. I would reserve such a long work week for older children. However I see nothing wrong with a 9 year old working a 30 hour week or younger child working 20 hours. Many kids play video games for that many hours per week.

Please let your Congressmen know that you support the Lee-Kimble Resolution to reinstate employment rights for children. Please join us in standing up for those too young to stand up for themselves.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Congressman Kimble Launches Website to Explore White House Bid

My Friends,

Deciding to decide that it was time to make the decision whether or not to pursue the Republican nomination for President of this great country is one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. Making this decision was not something I entered into lightly. I believe I still have work to do in Congress. However, I see that I am being called for something greater.

America, your prayers have been answered. I have consulted heavily with the Koch Brothers and several other job creators who have all told me of the excessive barriers they face in this country. Many of these fine men and women are paying far higher taxes than their employees and that sort of unfairness must stop now. It is time for a candidate who will stand up for the little guy whether he is a person or a corporation. I will do what is best for all America.

I urge all Americans who have been uplifted by my message of hope to rally around me at my new website www.kimble2012.com. If you believe in me as I believe in you, please urge me to run for President. If I see the outpouring of support that I am expecting, I will throw my hat into the ring and with your support I will be the next President of the greatest country in the world. Thank you and God bless America.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Jack Kimble's Message to Freshmen Congressmen



As GOP Pledge Chair, I feel very fortunate that I am not only given an opportunity to help our Congressmen bond, but also to help them understand some of the complex decisions that we must make as legislators if we're to keep to our legislative strategy this Congress. I made this short two minute video to brief them on a myriad of Republican positions.

Saturday, September 4, 2010

Kimble Wins Debate vs. Fagen


[In a poll done shortly after the 9/4 debate between Congressman Jack Kimble and notorious businessman Daniel Fagen, results showed 54% of registered voters believed that Congressman Kimble either mostly won or kind of won the debate.]

ROGER HAWKE: Good evening from the Heritage Valley Ice Arena. I'm Roger Hawk of "Rancho Podrido This Week" on Cable Channel 19. Welcome to the first of two debate between Republican Congressman Jack Kimble and Oak Hill resident and Democratic nominee Dan Fagen.

The Kiwanis Club is the sponsor of this event and tonight's discussion will cover a wide range of topics, including domestic and foreign policy matters.

It will be divided roughly into three-minute segments. Each candidate will have 90 seconds to respond to a direct question and then his opponent will receive an additional minute for rebuttal and follow-up. The order has been determined by a coin toss.

The specific subjects and questions were chosen by me and have not been shared or cleared with anyone on the campaigns or on the commission. The audience here in the hall has promised to remain very polite, no cheers, applause, no untoward outbursts, except right at this minute now, as we welcome Congressman Kimble and Dan Fagen

(APPLAUSE)

FAGEN: Nice to meet you.

KIMBLE: It's a pleasure. Your suit is shiny.

FAGEN: Thank you

KIMBLE: Can I touch your suit?

HAWKE: Gentlemen, thank you for coming.

As we have determined by a coin toss, the first question will go to Dan Fagen with a 60-second follow-up from Congressman Kimble.

The economy is the most pressing issue for many California voters. Whether we're still in a recession or a so called jobless recovery, the status quo is not working for the working people of this state. How will you address the economy when elected?

KIMBLE: Let me begin by saying it's great to be here Roger and I love that tie.

I do take issue with the way you singled out the working people of California in your question. Many of my closest friends and family members are independently wealthy. They are suffering too as their investments decrease in value.

You know in 1980, Ronald Reagan invented an economic theory called supply side economics and he showed during his presidency that the best way to improve the economy was to put the hard working men and women of this country to work and the best way to do that is to cut the taxes on the rich.

You see in supply side or trickle down economics, when you allow the wealthy to keep more of their money and they use that money to tip very well--much higher than 15%. In that way, the prosperity that is given to the top income earners trickles down to the masses. That's what this country is built on. I not only favor extending the Bush tax cuts, I am in favor of doubling them. I believe we can afford to pay for them if we begin a program to fine those who choose not to do their fair share--the unemployed.

HAWKE: Thank you, Congressman. I apologize if my use of the term "working people" offended anybody.

Mister Fagen?

FAGEN: Thank you, Roger. And I thank the Kiwanis, also. I appreciate this privilege of being able to be here and speak with the 54th District and I have to say how am I losing to this guy?

The reason that this economy is suffering is because the middle class is an endangered species. CEOs and the wealthy of this country have been overcompensated for at least the past 10 years. It's the rest of us who are feeling the pinch. Only 7% of private employees are in labor unions and benefits keep getting cut. America has for generations been the land of opportunity where people could rise beyond their station. That's gone.

The first thing I want from Washington is an extension of unemployment benefits. There are no jobs out there, we're not fooling anybody. The second thing I want is a second targeted stimulus package like the first one we had before we started negotiating with Republicans who voted against it anyway after we made concessions. Will this increase the debt. Yes it will, but you do not cut your way out of a recession. Leaving our children a legacy of debt is tragic, but leaving them with a feudalistic corporate economy without a middle class is unconscionable.

HAWKE: Mister Fagen how, as congressman, would you work to shrink this gap of polarization which has sprung up in Washington, which you both have spoken about here tonight?

FAGEN: Well, I hate to say it, but that gap isn't going away anytime soon. Extremes and redistricting have eliminated your Lincoln Chaffey Republicans and your Sam Nunn Democrats.

I can tell you that the Republicans have made it their mission for the past two years to say no to the Democrats on everything from health care for 9/11 responders to helping small business. If they win again, they'll be emboldened and the congress will shut down for two years as we await the 2012 election. Our country can't afford this.

As your Congressman, I will work with anybody regardless of party to help the citizens of this great district, but I won't compromise our values just so I can say we got 2 Republican votes.

HAWKE: Congressman Kimble.

KIMBLE: I love corn dogs. Sometimes I'll deep them in sweet mustard, but I also really like them plain. I'm sure many of you were at the Heritage Valley Corn Dog Festival a few weeks back.

I think the corn dog is the most Republican food. You take something good like a hot dog. You make it better by deep frying it. Then you put it on a stick so you can eat it while you're walking around or working. That's why corn dogs sell so well in Republican places like here or Texas.

Now Democrats are more like funnel cake. You just plop it on a plate and toss some sugar on it. You might want some funnel cake after you have another corn dog, but wouldn't you really just have another corn dog?

HAWKE: You have another 30 seconds Congressman. Did you wish to expand on your answer?

KIMBLE: No. Well other than to say, I could really go for a corn dog.

HAWKE: How have your experiences before entering public service helped you to understand the people of the district you represent.

KIMBLE: I'm glad you asked that. As a businessman, I learned how to make the hard decisions and how to earn a full day's pay by doing a full day's work. I did a lot of things in business that were important and essential to making money and profit in a professional type manner and in doing so the value to taxpayers and employees of our company was maximized further more.

My opponent doesn't know what it's like to be a businessman behind blue ties. I know that their dreams are not as empty as their conscious seems to be.

FAGEN: If I may Roger, Baba O'Republican seems to be quoting Who lyrics now. The truth is that the only job he ever had was working for his dad. Unfortunately, when he finally struck out on his own in his 40s, he wound up as our responsibility as tax payers.

My experiences as a teacher as well as a life source pilot on weekends let me look at our educational and health care systems first hand. My work in the peace corps in Uganda taught me a lot about the crises in Africa. All my life has been about service to people and that's why despite coming from a humble background myself, the Daniel and Margaret Fagen Foundation, which I named after my beloved parents has donated over 4.5 million dollars to charity in the past year.

HAWKE: Mr. Fagen, you have the chance to make the first closing statement.

FAGEN: Thank you Roger. As you know, my wife and I operate several shelters for battered women. When you are on the front lines of personal crises it isn't always pretty. Sometimes these women go back to an abusive relationship no matter how much you try and stop them and no matter how much they think they're ready to move on.

I admit that these last two years in Washington haven't been everything I hoped they'd be, but America you were in an abusive relationship when the Republicans were in charge and they took your money, they took your self-respect, and in some cases they took your children in unnecessary war overseas. It might be tempting to be disillusioned and say a pox on both your houses, but I can tell you that if you let people like Congressman Kimble represent you for the next two years, it won't get better. It will get worse. Send me to Washington to serve you and I promise I'll spend my time trying to fix things and not trying to win political points.

HAWKE: Congressman Kimble, your closing remarks.

KIMBLE: Life is one big political primary for God. Let's pray that we all get the nomination. I wish we had more time to go over the issues tonight. We haven't even talked about whether President Obama is a Muslim or not.

I know there are a lot of senior citizens watching this debate so let me just say that Obama's agenda is terrifying. Not only will your medical decisions be made by death panels whose main interest will be in harvesting your organs, but Obama is working with Nancy Pelosi right now to pass a law making it illegal for grandchildren to visit their grandparents.

My opponent is great at fancy speechifying, but I know that the voters of the 54th District are far too sophisticated to fall for his lies and half truths. Together, we can take back America to a better time when people weren't so uppity and music wasn't so loud. Thank you.

HAWKE: That ends tonight's debate. We want to thank the folks here at the Heritage Valley Ice Arena, and the Kiwanis

Thank you, Congressman Kimble and Mister Fagen. Good night, everybody.


Monday, May 3, 2010

Congressman Kimble Addresses the Pacific Coast Petroleum Institute

[A speech by Congressman Jack Kimble to the Pacific Coast Petroleum Institute]

My friends, this is not an easy time for any of us. A cataclysm of unspeakable proportions threatens the Gulf of Mexico. Thousands of barrels of oil have spilled into the Gulf and every five days an Exxon Valdez worth of oil spills into the Gulf. The damage is immeasurable and the full impact of this disaster will not be seen for years to come.

It is natural that at this time of crisis our prayers and our sympathies go out to the BP shareholders and board of directors. I see the suffering on the faces of my friends who lobby for them, in the stock ticker, and I want to help in anyway that I can. However, even as a member of the U.S. House of Representatives there is very little I can do to alleviate their suffering.

I am reminded of President Reagan after the Challenger disaster when he said, “Nothing ends here; our hopes and our journeys continue.”

Those words are truer now that ever. We choose to drill for oil offshore not because it is easy, but because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone by using renewable energy, and because as Americans we know we look stupid in small electric cars. As Americans it is our God given right to explore this great country from sea to shining sea and to do so at 14 miles per gallon.

Already, the forces of big government want to use this tragedy as an excuse to apply big government solutions to cleaning up this spill and putting in so called “common sense” regulations into place. Do not be fooled. I heard Rush Limbaugh earlier today and he makes an excellent point, "The ocean will take care of this on its own if it was left alone and left out there," Limbaugh said. "It's natural. It's as natural as the ocean water is."

We know that eventually the oil will simple mix into the waters of the ocean and be so diluted by the huge quantities of water to be harmless, but unfortunately the damage will already be done. Oil prices may be reaching $100 a barrel by mid-Summer and as Americans we cannot accept this.

I am calling on President Obama to work with Republicans in Congress to look for new places where we can drill. We should not rest until every usable drop of oil is extracted from the Earth for it is the lifeblood of our economy. This is a time where we can make no small plans. This is a time for action. This is a time for America to again stand tall. This is a time to drill, baby drill.

Congressman Kimble on Terrance Howard Incident

This Saturday was the White House Correspondents Dinner and unfortunately I was the victim of some very scandalous gossip involving an incident between myself and Terrence Howard. It was a very awkward evening for me because of the presence of Helen Thomas and I always hate running into exes at public events. Mr. Howard, who is a very gifted African-American actor, was seating at the Fox News table, which was located next to mine. A playful shoving match occurred at one point in the night, which was interpreted by many to be a fight--it was not. I was also not drunk at any point during the evening. Over the course of several hours, 9 Rob Roys is not that much to drink for somebody with a full meal in their stomach. Mostly, it was an exciting evening and both Mr. Howard and I very much enjoyed the hysterical comedy of Jay Leno whose wit knows no racial barrier.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Congressman Kimble's Apology at CPAC


Good morning, and thank you for joining me. Many of you in this room are my friends. Many of you in this room know me. Many of you have voted for me or you've canvassed for me or you've supported me.

Now every one of you has good reason to be critical of me. I want to say to each of you, simply and directly, I am deeply sorry for my irresponsible and juvenile behavior I engaged in.

I know people want to find out how I could be so selfish and so foolish. People want to know how I could have said these things to my Congressman Blackburn and to Congressman Pence. And while I have always tried to take full responsibility for my actions, there are some things I want to say.
My references “hoo has”, “naughty bits”, “jugs”, as well as my unfortunate and off key rendition of a song I wrote called “Thanks for the Mammaries” was shameful and an anathema to the families values conservative principles that I have upheld since my unfortunate incident in the LAX parking lot in 2008. I apologize for any hurt I may have caused by my comments, or by the making of “awuga” sounds.
In my defense I can only offer the following explanation. After, a night of very limited sleep because of a house guest, I overheard a conversation between Congressman Pence and Congressman Blackburn in wish Congressman Pence expressed his desire for “hotly contested midterms” I overheard him as saying “hot, big chested interns”. When Congressman Blackburn said, “I never had one of those myself” and they laughed, I took things completely the wrong way and embarrassed both of my colleagues.

My beautiful wife Kerry and I have started the process of discussing the damage caused by my behavior. As Kerry pointed out to me, my real apology to her will not come in the form of words; it will come in the form of expensive jewelry, which I will have to buy her. We have a lot to discuss; however, what we say to each other will remain between the two of us until my memoirs come out sometime in 2011.

I am also aware of the pain my behavior has caused to those of you in this room. I have let you down, and I have let down my supporters. For many of you, especially my friends, my behavior has been a personal disappointment. To those of you who work for me, I have let you down personally and professionally yet again. My behavior has caused considerable worry to the lobbyists who have done so much to support me.

For all that I have done, I am so sorry.

I've had a lot of time to think about what I've done. My failures have made me look at myself in a way I never wanted to before. It's now up to me to make amends, and that starts by never repeating the mistakes I've made. It's up to me to start living a life of integrity. You can support that life, by donating to my 2010 campaign. Holding onto my seat is a key to reigning in Obama’s socialist programs.

I once heard, and I believe it's true, it's not what you achieve in life that matters; it's what you overcome. I believe myself, David Vitter, and Tom Ensign play the part daily of setting an example. Character and decency are what really count.

Parents used to point to me as a role model for their kids. I owe all those families a special apology. I want to say to them that I am truly sorry that those children had to see me acting like a motorboat in a sexually inappropriate way.

As I proceed, I understand people have questions. I understand the press wants to ask me for the details and what I meant by the term “meaty, big, and bouncy.” I understand people want to know whether Kerry and I will remain together. Please know that as far as I'm concerned, Kerry and I have a marriage as solid as a rock. She has explained to me that she needs sometime to clear her head before we can put this behind ourselves and she will be spending the recess hiking the Appalachian Trail and coming to grips with the embarrassment I have put her through.

I recognize I have brought this on myself, and I know above all I am the one who needs to change. I owe it to my district to become a better person. I owe it to those closest to me to become a better man. That's where my focus will be. Towards this end, I will begin taking classes in both cooking and ballroom dancing. I have already begun to start a bodybuilding regime recommended by former Mr. Universe Lou Ferrigno.

I have a lot of work to do, and I intend to dedicate myself to doing it. Part of following this path for me is Catholicism, which my mother taught me at a young age. People probably don't realize it, but I was raised a Catholic, and I actively practiced my faith from childhood until I drifted away from it when Notre Dame was eliminated from BCS contention this season. Catholicism teaches that we have an awful lot to feel guilty for. It teaches me to not eat meat on Friday regardless of how superior Roy Rogers’ hamburgers are to their fish sandwich. Obviously I lost track of what I was taught.

In discussing my situation with Newt Gingrich, I've learned the importance of looking at my spiritual life and keeping in balance with my professional life. I need to regain my balance and be centered so I can save the things that are most important to me, my marriage and my children.

That also means relying on others for help. I've learned to seek support from lobbyists in Washington, and I hope someday to return that support to them that they have given me. I especially want to thank Citibank, Marlboro, and Coca Cola who have been amazing generous corporate underwriters since a recent Supreme Court decision gave them that right.

I want to thank CPAC, House Minority Leader John Boehner, and the Republican Party for their patience and understanding while I work on my private life. I look forward to casting no votes with them in the months and years to come.

Finally, there are many people in this room, and there are many people at home who believed in me. Today I want to ask for your help. I ask you to find room in your heart to one day believe in me again.

Thank you.

Friday, January 22, 2010

Supreme Court Ruling is a Victory for Democracy

On Thursday, the Supreme Court voted 5-4 to let corporations spend as much money as they want on campaign contributions. Companies can all buy commercial time to run commercials right through the election. This is great news for the American people.

Some may call this a case of activist judges running amok, but I believe this is what the founding fathers wanted when they first incorporated this country. As a congressman, I have frequently found myself wishing that insurance companies and banks could make their voices heard so I would know how they feel on certain issues—now I can finally hear their side of things. It is great to know that industry can finally have its voice heard.

My father was thrilled to find out that he would no longer have to finance 90% of my campaign alone. For those of you who have been sending in campaign contributions, you have my gratitude, but it is no longer necessary. You can stop sending me money. This is a victory for the little guy to because it was thanks to large organizations like Freedom Works that the Teabag movement was funded.

To corporations I would like to say, “I’m listening.” If there is anything you need, my door will always be open to you. I am very interested in selling the naming rights to my seat in congress much like professional sports teams do. Every time I am interviewed on television, instead of saying Jack Kimble (R-CA) it could say Jack Kimble (R-CA-Citibank) or Jack Kimble (R-CA-PNC). This is tremendous news for democracy and for the robocall industry. After all, corporations who need other corporations are the luckiest corporations in the world.

Friday, November 6, 2009

A Day in My Life

Do you know what your U.S. Representative does? If not, you're not alone. Even though members of Congress play key roles in our government, they often are overlooked. They are democracy’s utility infielders.

What do members of Congress do? How do they spend their days? I think this is a very fascinating question. I’d like to try and answer it for you.

6:00 a.m.
I am up very early in the morning. My alarm is set for 5:00, but I hit snooze until 6:00. While I’m still in my pajamas I pour myself a bowl of cereal. I used to buy the small variety packs—you know the ones that have Cocoa Puffs, Lucky Charms, Rice Krispies, in tiny little boxes all wrapped up in cellophane. The problem is those boxes don’t have prizes in them. Now, I buy big boxes of cereal so I can still get something extra—that’s the Republican way. If the cereal gets stale, I buy a new box.

I like to take my cereal to the living room and watch early morning television. One of the local UHF station shows Mama’s Family and Gomer Pyle back to back. I like to start my day off with a laugh. After breakfast, I walk to the Capitol building.

8:00 a.m.
I have breakfast with a group of House Republicans and Joe Lieberman. This is mostly an excuse for myself to gloat to Duncan Hunter about what a bust Roy Williams has been on his Fantasy Football team. We try to explain football to Lieberman, but despite him saying “oh I get it” a lot, you know he doesn’t.

9:00 a.m.
My next stop is the House champer for a Republican conference meeting. Here, I have a great chance to talk directly to Republican leaders, or I would if we had some. I really look forward to this face to face time with my colleagues. It’s so funny, Joe Lieberman always follows us in here and we have to remind him that he caucuses with the Democrats. Then he acts like he was just kidding.

9:45 a.m.
I head over to my committee meetings. I’m on the Agriculture, Budget, Industrialization, and Protocol committees as well as the Softball Team and Glee Club. I’m told that committees do a lot of the important work in Congress, but they’re just so boring. I usually pass notes with one of my colleagues. Trent Franks is an amazing tic tac toe player and he can always beat me unless I can put a mark in the middle square first. Whether you can get a nap here or not really depends on your committee leader.
11:00 am.
I’m on the phone with C-Span, letting them know that I’m available to do interviews on any topic. They tell me they’ll get back to me, but they sound like they mean it this time.

11:30 a.m.
Unexpected events often happen. That’s why it’s important to make yourself scarce in the middle of the day as much as possible. If there are lunch plans, I’ll stick around. It’s always more fun to go as a group. If I’m on my own, I’ll usually go to Roy Rogers for the Double R Bar Burger.
1:00 p.m.
I get together with my staff and we watch Judge Mathis together. My office never misses the Judge if we can help it. I was so made that Obama overlooked him entirely for the Supreme Court. My staff also is in charge of making sure I see only positive mail. I’m currently working on a delicate international situation involving the Nigerian royal family that began with an email to my office. I am hopefully that I will be able to help this prince regain his rightful throne.

2:00 p.m.
I’m off to the National Republican Congressional Committee meeting. The NRCC works to get Republicans elected to Congress and we really hope we can turn things around. Lately, it’s just been one big cry session.

5:00 p.m.
A special voting session of the House of Representatives begins, and I go to my seat in the House chamber. Bells go off in our offices--just like in school--and we have 15 minutes to go to the House to cast our votes,

Voting usually occurs on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, and starts at about noon. But toward the end of a congressional session, voting can take place on any workday and can run late into the night, as the House rushes to complete work on legislation. This is great nap time. Ipods are strongly discouraged here—I found out the hard way. Speaker Pelosi will stare at you with her cold dead eyes if she thinks you’re screwing around. Sometimes, I like to make fart noises and dare her to catch me.

9:00 p.m.
Joe Lieberman always wants us to go to a hot tub party after a vote, but he’s so wrinkled now. I always decline. Instead, this is a good time to get together with colleagues at one of the local DC watering holes. Paul Broun always winds up in tears, but today he’s upbeat. He wants me to see if Debbie Wasserman Schultz likes him. I ask him if he means likes him and he says “like him like him”. I guess I’ll work on this tomorrow.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Congressman Kimble Supports Senator Lieberman on Public Option



I happen to be a great fan of Joe Lieberman. I took some heat for this in 2000 when he was brainwashed by Al Gore and ran against our beloved President Bush. I have to admit, I could even feel empathy for the many Democrats who were crestfallen at the thought of Joe being denied the Vice-Presidency in such a close election. I’ve been a big fan of Joe Lieberman for nearly 20 years since he first won my heart as Willie on the television show Alf. His deadpan, put upon, whining delivery has served him well as a Senator as well.

Though Joe is older now, I can attest that he looks like a man half his age in a spedo. He’s living proof that with good living, you really don’t need health care. Today, he took a lot of flack from his own party, or former party, or whatever the Democrats are when he announced he would not vote for a health care bill with the public option and in fact he wouldn’t even vote to end a filibuster unless the public option was removed from the legislation.

Joe’s problems with the public option is the same as my own:

  1. The government cannot handle things like this efficiently and it would do a terrible job insuring people.
  2. The public option will increase competition and lower the profit margins of insurance companies at a time when they can least afford it.
  3. The public option will lead to communism by 2012.

Joe has said that he would to keep the rest of the bill and in 3 or 4 years revisit things to see if we might want to investigate the possibility of creating a trigger that if reached would possibly bring us the public option. Without the public option, the current program will work to lower health care costs and insure people by fining people heavily if they don’t buy health insurance This will help the insurance companies by increasing their profits and help the uninsured by making them by health care.

Joe has once again shown himself to be a figure of integrity and courage. A lot of people would have been scared to stand against the public option when like Lieberman, they were so heavily financed by the insurance industry. I had the same problem just last year when I had to make the difficult decision of supporting the tobacco industry despite the fact that they heavily funded my campaign. I made the right choice and went with my conscience the same way that Joe Lieberman has today. This is truly what being a member of Congress is all about.

Sunday, October 11, 2009


One of the keys of my reelection campaign is getting my name out there. Last week, I was on Bobo and Moon Pie’s Morning Mayhem radio show and I thought it went really well. As a service to voters in my district, here’s a transcript:

Bobo: You know I’m not a big fan of politicians.

Traffic Lady Doris: Do you even vote?

Bobo: I vote on American Idol, that’s like the same thing.

TLD: :::Laughing:: Bobo, you’re insane.

Moonpie: What was your first clue Doris? For me it’s that shirt :::laughing:::

Bobo: If I could please continue. This next politician is our own Representative Jack Kimble and I think he’s doing a great job. If you talk to him he’s one politician that actually makes sense.

MP: Then why’s he on with us? :::laughter::

TLD: Yeah, that’s a big mistake ::laughter::

Representative Kimble: Hello, I’ve been listening to this show. What is your intern’s name?

Bobo: Sir Fartsalot.

RK: You guys are insane, but you’re having fun and that’s great to see.

MP: It’s good to see you Congressman. Now, why are you running for reelection?

RK: President Obama has 7 years left in his term. I believe that this country can’t afford to have a business as usual representative that will work with him. I believe we need a representative like myself that will automatically say no regardless of what he proposes. I’ve been out there at tea bagging parties and I’ve seen the disillusionment of many in this district.

Bobo: He said teabagging :::laughter:::

MP: So are you ready to face our listeners congressman?

RJK: I’m looking forward to it.

Conserative Pat: Hey guys, The Morning Mayhem rocks! This blows away the Morning Zoo, Morning Madhouse, and the Morning Crew. :::Honk:: You are the best Congressman. Anybody who stands up to Obama has my vote. You know, I don’t think he was even born in this country.

Bobo: Dp you have a question for the Congressman Pat?

CP: Oh yeah, I was wondering if it’s difficult to balance being a congressman and a family man?

RJK: Well, I’ve known my wife since we were in high school.

TLD: Were you high school sweethearts?

RJK: Actually, we met on vacation. She was from another state.

MP: You know I don’t think I’ve ever seen her.

RJK: She’s a very private person. She supports me completely, but she doesn’t like to be filmed or photographed or appear in public, so I respect her privacy.

Bobo: OK, there’s nothing strange about that. Carl you’re on the Morning Mayhem.

Carl: Thanks Bobo. Congressman Kimble, I had a question about making a campaign donation.

RJK: You know we love to hear that.

Carl: Great. When your mother was staying over last night, she left without taking the money I left for her on the nightstand.

RJK: That isn’t a problem. We can even take paypal or credit card.

Carl: OK, but see your mother was staying over last night and see we were sleeping together and then I was giving her money for it and then oh never mind :::hang up:::

RJK: Thanks for calling. Please don’t forget to donate.

Bobo: Pedro you’re on the Morning Mayhem.

Pedro: I’m a gay man.

TLD: So is my hairdresser.

MP: So is Bobo

Bobo: Hey now…Go ahead with you question Pedro.

Pedro: I wanted to know what the congressman though about Representative Gohmert saying that homosexuality leads to necrophilia?

RJK: I wanted let that get to you. That’s just how he talks. The other day we were trying to decide where to go for lunch. I wanted to go for Thai and he wanted Tex Mex. He told me that eating Tex Mex would lead to necrophilia. Cowboys losing to the Broncos–same thing. He really seems hung up on necrophilia for some reason.

Bobo: OK, there’s nothing weird about that. Cindy, you’re on with Congressman Kimble.

Cindy: Hello Congressman. You’ve got a very sexy voice.

RJK: Thank you Cindy.

Cindy: Congressman, I’m begging for some help here. I’m a single mother. I have 3 children. I’m a freelance graphic artist. I don’t get insurance from work and I can’t afford to buy it. Why won’t you support health care reform so that my children can be covered?

RJK: Do you want health care to be like the DMV or the post office? I don’t think…

Cindy: Congressman I have a driver’s license and I get mail. I don’t have health care.

RJK: You’re a graphic artist right?

Cindy: Yes, I’m freelance though.

RJK: You know, I know of another free lance artist. He was on a long train ride when he decided to draw a mouse.

Cindy: I’m not Walt Disney congressman. I just need health care.

RJK: Well I’m sorry, but we’ll just have to disagree here.

MP: Why are you so opposed to government run health care.

RJK: I think a lot of us our. I know of at least one congressman who believes that the government option will lead to necrophilia.

Bobo: Damn you Louis Gohmert.

MP: Let’s check in with Sir Fartsalot. He’s getting waxed at the Giorgio La Puma Spa.

TLD: Oh I bet he’s going to be screaming.