Jack Kimble Anounces Presidential Endorsement

This has been a hard fought GOP Presidential Primary Race and more than anything I wanted to emerge as the Republican nominee. Unfortunately, it was not to be. However, I would be foolish not to admit at this time that the remaining field is an embarrassment of riches. We would be lucky to have any of them as our nominee to take on President Obama.

As I thought further, I realized what I was looking for was a candidate who can speak with authority on family values like Newt Gingrich, yet also speak with the authority on the economy that Mit Romney has with everyday working stiffs. If he had the same ability to ride with the back and forth and come from behind the way Rick Santorum does we'd have a winner. Throw in expressive eyebrows like Ron Paul and we've got another Reagan.

Unfortunately, reviewing the candidate, I found that the only candidate who really had all these qualities was myself. I have dropped out of the race, but there is still no reason why people cannot continue to write me in. For that reason, I am endorsing Jack Kimble for President of the United States.

Soon after writing this, I realized that endorsing myself wasn't really the wisest course of action. In Iowa, God had endorsed me and I do believe that through God all things are possible. That's why I'm also endorsing God.

Finally, I needed a candidate with a chance to win. While God should have everybody's support and while I am clearly the most qualified candidate, I wanted to endorse somebody who was still in the race. The answer was clear---former Louisiana Governor Buddy Roemer has had the same trouble having his message heard as I have. The establishment is clearly as afraid of him as they are of me and while I have not been able to get him to endorse my stands on child labor or encasing the United States in a 15 foot wall paid for by advertising, Roemer is clearly a candidate of solid principles.

So, in order, I am endorsing the following candidates:

1. Myself (write me in)
2. Jesus (would have been my first choice for running mate)
3. Buddy Roemer (still fighting the good fight)